I can relate to that cry! I think I must have have said it at heart over and over again for 25+ years from the late '80s - sometimes meaning it more, sometimes less. After all those years, it
gradually happened - my paying job is to be around handicapping and horse-racing and its people all the time!
Time is a funny thing - sometimes it passes so slowly, sometimes too quickly (just ask Smarty Jones trying to hold off Birdstone for a 2004 Triple Crown ...). But always a component of the passing of time - is NOW.
Can you say why you feel the need at this point in your life to be around racing and to work races every day? Is it that you seek financial security? Do you love the challenge of solving a highly complex puzzle, or the satisfaction of being able to do something few others can do (make money betting horses)?
Are you seeking refuge (or 'greener pastures') from an unsatisfactory former work situation, or accumulated debt?
Just playing with scenarios here, not presuming that anything in particular is your actual story. It always captivates me to compare my story with that of others! I guess that's why I ask
One thing I am
absolutely sure about - whatever you
say is true about yourself NOW -
is your current reality. If you see yourself as 'not worthy' to command the knowledge and finesse in handicapping/wagering which perhaps you think you observe in some posters here (or in our illustrious Methodology forebears) - that is your reality NOW.
If you hold that while perhaps temporarily out of your grasp (i.e. beyond your accumulated knowledge,
so far) - a profitable approach to analysis and wagering, and a thrill from watching horses compete and your opinions about them be validated frequently - is something you KNOW you can and DESERVE to be able to do - then all the 'cursed details' standing between where you are now and that imagined future will surely sort themselves out, step by step, as you persistently aim and take direction toward the goal you live in your imagination for yourself NOW, day by day. (Don't professional bettors, or concert pianists, or brain surgeons - see themselves TODAY and every NOW as successful at what they do ALREADY, not just in at some fuzzy future maybe-one-day mental scenario?)
I really believe this is how change happens for a person. The effect of what you BELIEVE to be possible is what makes ANYTHING possible.
How much money do you need? To support yourself, your family, pay off debts? Will a $10 an hour at Taco Bell , or as a security guard (
) do the job, BUT give you the
free time to pursue your dreams? If you already have a Masters degree and utilize it (or under-utilize it, or hate that job), do you then have 20 hours a week which you now don't have to spend on getting that Masters to instead spend on getting a Masters in horse racing investment?
Just random thoughts! I do hope you are eventually able to find a job which gives you sufficient security, and sufficient free time to work on your dreams. And THEN, that you find the bravery to respond to the challenge to accumulate the knowledge and experience to gradually apply that to horse racing - likely as a significant, perhaps profitable hobby, but perhaps as a passionately held and even profitable livelihood.
Realistically, very few people should rely on horse race betting for their livelihood, but the sweetness of life has to come from somewhere, and what finer endeavour is there than this game to practice self-improvement, self-discipline, helping others, feeling excitement and motivation - feeling ALIVE, I guess!
End of rant
(Probably another one brewing ...)
All good things!
yours,
Ted